"The experience of a crisis immobilizes us for a long period of time. Our mind is focused on the disaster aspects of the situation, and we are unable to function effectively. We are unable to sleep or eat, and do not know how we are going to get past the terrible set of circumstances. We use our minds to focus on what is wrong, how painful it is, and how terrible it is going to be in the future." -Wayne Dyer
What Wayne Dyer says in that quote describes perfectly how I got stuck. And he goes on to say that when we're in it, we have no idea that what happened could be the beginning of a transformation. That one day we might even be glad for it, in some way. Raising my hand here about that, for sure.
Have you ever looked back on a time like that and realized that, awful as it was, it led to a positive transformation in your life? Maybe even to a deeper faith or spiritual practice?
That is what I am hoping for from this experience I am having. But what do you do when you want to find your way back to a spiritual practice, or take the next step in the journey of transformation, but you're not sure where or how to start?
"Perhaps you spend your time in centering prayer or meditation, practicing yoga, journaling, creating, or reading poetry. Simply choose a practice that helps you connect to the Divine and enables you to feel like your true self, whether the practice is traditional or unique to you. Do one or many, or perhaps consider changing them monthly or seasonally" ~ ASacredJourney
I like what she says here, and I agree. There are many ways to be spiritual, to connect to the truth of who you are, and choosing a spiritual practice you enjoy, whether it is traditional or not, is the best way to honor your desire for spirituality.
It reminds me of a woman I met right before I graduated from high school. She told me she wasn't much for going to church, but she felt close to God whenever she was out in nature.
Did you ever watch The Waltons? Much to Olivia's consternation, she could rarely get her husband, John, inside a church. But he'd say that he believed; he just didn't want to practice his faith by going to church.
When I was younger, I thought that was the main reason for deciding what you believed - then, you'd know which church (or synagogue or mosque) to go to when it was time to worship. Now that I am older, I know that faith and spirituality can be practiced in any number of ways.
And it's personal. So you can get lots of ideas that might feel right to you, but you can't know for sure, until you try it.
So finding your way back or moving toward a deeper expression of spirituality or faith may look and sound and feel different to you than it does to your family or your best friend or your next-door neighbor.
And what has become important to me, in this weirdness where I kinda believe this, but may no longer believe that, and sometimes have a tuned-in moment but mostly only wish I did, is to let it be whatever it is right now. And to know that it just doesn't matter how it compares to what others are experiencing.
Even if they are people I love and admire.